Friday, December 30, 2016

New Year’s Sizzle: Two Sexy Seasonal Novellas

If you're looking for something hot to read this New Year's Eve, might I recommend New Year's Sizzle? I've coupled two New Year's novellas (Cougar's Eve and Out of the Cold) and published them together in this collection.

Out of the Cold is a romantic comedy full of erotic emails while Cougar's Eve focuses on a middle-aged woman who unexpectedly rediscovers the joy of sex with a little help from some younger men and women. One story's straight, the other one's bisexual and full of menage content. They're both a lot of fun and perfect for holiday reading!

New Year’s Sizzle
Two Sexy Seasonal Novellas
by Giselle Renarde

Celebrate in style with New Year’s Sizzle!

In Cougar’s Eve, Trish has big plans: a giant bowl of popcorn, a nice warm blanket, and binge-watching TV. She isn’t enthused when a friend drags her to Cougar’s Eve, but it’s been sooo long. One night living the cougar life couldn’t ruin her forever… could it?

In Out of the Cold, geeky Amira is desperate for fun. When she meets Keith at a first aid training course, she sneaks a peek at his registration form to get his email address. After exchanging some very naughty notes, they plan a get-together on New Year's Eve… but the man she meets isn’t Keith at all! Will Amira ring in the New Year with her online romance, or will she be left out in the cold?

Forget all your troubles and leap into a sexy new year with two entertaining novellas from award-winning author Giselle Renarde!

Where can you purchase New Year's Sizzle? Lots of place, including:

Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/books/details?id=CwjNDQAAQBAJ
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/692442?ref=GiselleRenardeErotica
Excitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/new-year-s-sizzle-two-sexy-seasonal-novellas.html

iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1190392414
Kobo: https://www.kobo.com/ebook/new-year-s-sizzle-two-sexy-seasonal-novellas

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Have Yourself a #Sexy #Lesbian #Christmas!

https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-haveyourselfasexylesbianchristmas-1696009-166.html
I've got a sweet treat for you: my mini-anthology Have Yourself a Sexy Lesbian Christmas is on sale now for only $0.99! Do something just for YOU and snag this fun holiday collection now!

Is your holiday lacking lesbian cheer? Have you been craving seasonal sensuality since your neighbours erected a ten-foot inflatable Santa? Then this is the mini-anthology for you!

What’s inside? Three fan favourites plus a brand new meet-cute holiday hotmance Giselle wrote exclusively for this lovely little collection. No more digging around under the tree, hoping to unwrap the woman of your dreams. She’s right here, in Have Yourself a Sexy Lesbian Christmas!

Contains: Sugar Bush, Full to Bursting, Traditional Inuit Throat-Singing and NEW BONUS STORY Love It or Love It!

Where can you get this fun little book for under a buck?

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QS5AB7I?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00QS5AB7I

Kobo: http://store.kobobooks.com/en-CA/ebook/have-yourself-a-sexy-lesbian-christmas
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id949927136
BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/have-yourself-a-sexy-lesbian-christmas-giselle-renarde/1120874454

Enjoy!

Monday, December 19, 2016

For Lovers of Ass-Licking Lesbians: Blowing Smoke

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N1SXIYR?tag=dondes-20
I can't begin to tell you how many readers land on my blog after googling "lesbians licking ass" or "anal girls kiss butt" or "do lesbians eat assholes?" or some variation on that theme.

I haven't actually written a ton of anilingus stories, but seeing as there's a demand for girls slathering their tongues in and around other girls' buttholes, I've dreamed up this brand new story for you.

Blowing Smoke is my fave so far.

Don't read it if you're offended by cigarette-smoking, because there's some hardcore smoking fetish stuff in this one. What can I say? It adds a little mystique to the butt play.

The funny thing is, this is actually kind of a sweet love story at its base. I mean, what's lesbian ass licking without a little love?

https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-blowingsmokelesbianfetisherotica-2192092-356.html
Blowing Smoke
Lesbian Fetish Erotica
by Giselle Renarde

She worked in a vegan bakery. Tattoos, piercings, plaid shirt, tight jeans. Her black hair was always tied back in a bandana, which made her look like some kind of pin-up princess. She brought me coconut macaroons one day, special delivery. You’ll never believe what happened next. Who’d have guessed two girls on one block could harbor the same desire for blowing smoke and licking ass?

Blowing Smoke is available from a variety of vendors, including:
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N1SXIYR?tag=dondes-20
Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/books/details?id=bQW5DQAAQBAJ
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/689892?ref=GiselleRenardeErotica
Excitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/blowing-smoke-lesbian-fetish-erotica.html

Saturday, December 10, 2016

Food of Love: Gourmet Erotica

I'm really excited about this new anthology. Not only is it full of food sex and chefs and restaurant settings, it's a 100% altruistic project. I'm donating all my royalties from FOOD OF LOVE to to food banks accommodating immediate needs in Canada's North, as well as community services with a long-term focus on country foods and land-based programs in Nunavut, Yukon and the Northwest Territories.

I know this book's going to see a ton of sales because a) all profits go to a great cause, b) the price is really reasonable, and c) we're talking about quality fiction, here. It's not like I threw together a bunch of scraps (haha punny!). You're going to love my mouthwatering gourmet erotica.

In Food of Love, eroticist Giselle Renarde has assembled a collection of ten lip-smacking tales involving delicious desserts, yummy chefs, seductive restaurant settings, and heaps of fetishistic food play! Sticky and sweet, milky and messy, red hot and ice cold, these stories are sure to spice up your night. If you’re peachy keen on altruistic erotica, Food of Love will be the apple of your eye. Buy your copy today!


Food of Love is available from many vendors including Amazon
Kobo
iTunes
Barnes and Noble

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Stuff Your Stockings TODAY ONLY with FREE and $0.99 Ebooks!

http://scandalousreads.wixsite.com/index

STUFF YOUR E-READER with Scandalous Stocking Stuffers
TODAY ONLY!
50+ FREE books and $0.99 BARGAINS

Seasonal/Holiday Reads
Contemporary
BDSM Erotica, Romance
Steamy
BBW, Hotwife, Lesbian & Menage
Paranormal, Shifters, Science Fiction, Fantasy, Time Travel, Thriller
...

On the download page, please visit our author sponsors:
Allyson Lindt, Angela Kay Austin, Anita Philmar, Ashe Barker, C.P. Mandara, Caitlyn Lynch, Candace Laville, Carmen Fox, Catherine Taylor, Cherie Claire, Cherime MacFarlane, Dariel Raye, Demelza Carlton, Diane Rinella, Eden Summers, Elianne Adams, Elli Everson, Eva Lefoy, Giselle Renarde, Heather Anastasiu, Ines Johnson, Iona Findley, Jacintha Topaz, Jade Onyx, J.F. Holland, Josie Jax, Kathryn R. Blake, LaVerne Thompson, Lilah E. Noir, Lily Harlem, Lucian Carter, Lucy Felthouse, Maggie Carpenter, Marie Tuhart, Melissa Stevens, Mira Stanley, Miranda Lynn, Moctezuma Johnson, Monica Corwin, Muffy Wilson, Natalie Rios, Nia Farrell, Nikky Kaye, Normandie Alleman, Paloma Beck, Pandora Spocks, Raven Anxo, Robin Stone, Rosalie Redd, Sara Daniel, Sotia Lazu, Teresa Noelle Roberts, Tori Dean, Wendy Lynn Clark, Wren St Claire

Multi-author deals include stories from:
A.C. Nixon, Abby Hayes, Abi Aiken, Airicka Phoenix, Angelica Dawson, Ashen White, Bernard Tristan Foong, Bethany Shaw, Blak Rayne, Crystal Dawn, Danielle Gavan, Dawn White, D. F. Krieger, Elvira Bathory, Erzabet Bishop, Gale Stanley, Gemma Parkes, Gina Kincade, Isis Pierce, Jacqueline Sweet, Kiki Howell, Maddie Taylor, Pablo Michaels, Paige Matthews, Phoenix Johnson, P.T. Macias, R.B O'Brien, Rebecca Lorenson, Rozlyn Sparks, Sky Purington, Tara Crescent, Tierney O'Malley, Tricia Owens, Tanith Davenport

Monday, November 28, 2016

Love in the Leaves: A Stepbrother Menage

https://play.google.com/store/books/details?id=AiKZDQAAQBAJ
Much like my stepbrother novella Moving May, I stole Love in the Leaves from Lexi Wood, the mooching sock puppet who lives under my bed. Sure she wrote it, but she's better known for stepdaddy/stepdaughter pseudoincest erotica.

I think a stepbrother threesome story fits better in my catalogue.

Love in the Leaves
A Stepbrother Menage
by Lexi Wood Giselle Renarde

Felicia’s sick of double standards. When she flunks a college course, she’s sentenced to rake leaves. Infuriating! This isn’t how a grown woman deserves to be treated! Felicia’s stepbrother Jared has all the freedom he could ask for. He doesn’t have to tell anyone where he’s going with his idiot friends. When Jared and his buddies find Felicia raking leaves on the sprawling family estate, will they give her a hand… or drive her to distraction?

A sexy stepbrother MFM menage short!

Love in the Leaves is available from retailers such as...


Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/books/details?id=AiKZDQAAQBAJ
eXcitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/love-in-the-leaves-a-stepbrother-menage.html
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQNLOIU

...and if you buy it from Smashwords by the end of the year, make sure to redeem the following coupon:

Promotional price: $0.99
Coupon Code: RL73D
Expires: December 31, 2016

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/685958?ref=GiselleRenardeErotica

Friday, November 4, 2016

Burano Lace: A Mermaid Menage #99cents #Travel #Erotica


https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-buranolaceamermaidmenage-2158835-143.html

Hiya!

Just thought I'd let you know my story Burano Lace (previously published in an Xcite Books collection called Sex on the Beach) is now available as a cheapie ebook. If you're looking for some mermaid erotica, here it is--one from the vaults of Classic Giselle Erotica!

Available from...


Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/books/details?id=BldQDQAAQBAJ
Excitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/burano-lace-a-mermaid-menage.html

...and many other vendors!

Tuesday, November 1, 2016

Hey, Canada. I wrote a book for you.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01M9DY0D2?tag=dondes-20
It's November 1st. Do you know what that means?

Means my new novel comes out today.

In Shadow is a book for Canada. It's not just set here--it's about here.

I usually go on and on about my work, but something's holding me back on this one. I just want you to read it and see for yourself.

What I will do is caution you against believing everything my narrator tells you. Clover's got a lot going on in shadow. She's got a lot to figure out about herself and the world she lives in. Don't mistake her voice for mine.

As far as Clover’s concerned, she’s got two choices: remain an outcast in the small town where she’s lived her whole life, or move clear across the country like her prodigal stepbrother Mason. Clover is forever paying for her father’s sins at home, but the idea of leaving is too daunting to imagine. When Mason comes home for their sister’s wedding, his presence reignites Clover’s past. A dark force follows her everywhere she goes. Even in dreams, there’s no escaping a hungry shadow...

In Shadow was my 2015 NaNoWriMo novel, so it's fitting it should come out on the first day of NaNoWriMo 2016.

I love this novel. It's daring in an understated way. You're not going to find the same kind of adult content you see in my erotic novels. If anything, the sex that appear in In Shadow is somewhat... unsettling.

Now that I've got you totally confused, I'm going to highly recommend you buy yourself a copy of In Shadow and settle in. Or put it on your wishlist or Christmas list. You're going to want to read this book. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life.

There are so many places to buy this book. Here's are just a few (okay A LOT):

At Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01M9DY0D2
Amazon Canada: https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B01M9DY0D2
Amazon UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01M9DY0D2
Amazon Australia: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B01M9DY0D2

Large Print at Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1539578232

BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/in-shadow-giselle-renarde/1124327243
Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/ebook/in-shadow-a-novel
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1141673003

Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/656340?ref=GiselleRenardeErotica
Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/books/details?id=CfRCDQAAQBAJ

Go get it. Go now. Buy. Read. Be unsettled. And enjoy.

Sunday, October 30, 2016

50% Rebate for Halloween!


A spooky hello to you all!

Did you know that All Romance Ebooks is having a 50% rebate sale for Halloween? October 30-31 2016, you'll get a 50% rebate on everything you buy!

This is a perfect time to preorder my novel In Shadow, which comes out November 1st. Often I'll release a book at a sale price in hopes that lots of readers will grab it, but I'm not going that route with In Shadow. The price for the ebook edition of this novel is $5.99. If you preorder it today from All Romance, you'll get a $3 credit to your account! That's the closest you'll come to getting this baby on sale, so go for it! Now! Don't wait! Now, now, now!!!

Preorder In Shadow from All Romance Ebooks today!

This is the point in the story where you’re either going to think I’m lying or I’m crazy, or maybe both. Well, I’m not lying, so I guess that leaves you with your answer.

The afternoon sun was streaming in through the window above the door. It cast long shadows across the fabric dividing my studio from Gord’s portion of the garage. That wasn’t the weird part. In fact, I hadn’t even noticed our shadows until they started to move.

At first, I thought it was the fabric moving. I thought maybe Brooke had snuck in and got behind it. I thought she was trying to scare me like she used to do when we were little.

But the fabric wasn’t moving. The fabric stayed absolutely still while my shadow started bending forward.

That might have been the weirdest part, because I knew for a fact I wasn’t bending. In that moment, I don’t think I could have budged if I’d tried. My feet were two blocks of ice frozen to the cement floor, and my arms were like dead weight at my sides.

But my shadow’s arms? That was another story.

They rose at my shadow body’s sides, then wrapped ominously around my stepbrother’s shadow.

I was so sure Mason would whip around and be like, “Hey, get your hands off me!”

But he didn’t seem to feel it. He couldn’t seem to sense my shadow wrapping itself around his.

His shadow’s head turned to mine. I swallowed hard, because I could feel everything. Feel his head, his breath, his hardness. I could feel it all when his shadow kissed mine. I could feel the hugeness of his tongue in my mouth.

A warm flush whipped through me like lava, filling my cheeks with crimson heat before sliding down my throat. I felt him all over me and inside me as my shadow attached to his.

The real Mason talked the whole time, but I couldn’t hear a word. I couldn’t draw my gaze away from his shadow lifting my shadow off its feet, slamming its back against the wall, hiking up my skirt and…

https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-inshadowanovel-2153912-387.html

Saturday, October 29, 2016

#Lesbian #Watersports #Erotica for #HumiliationDay: Public Toilets

According to the internet, today is the first annual Erotic Humiliation Day. To celebrate, I'm posting a story called Public Toilets, which is from my book Wet Weekend--all about lesbians who live for pee!

I love this book! I wrote it after a weekend getaway with my girlfriend. While it's not entirely based on a true story, I set it at the inn where we stayed.

Enjoy the story, and if it's your kind of thing consider buying a copy of Wet Weekend to find out what other golden showery adventures Cassie and Talia experience on their little holiday.

Public Toilets

Lesbian Watersports Erotica

by Giselle Renarde



http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0128EACV2?tag=dondes-20“Your table is right this way,” the server said, in an off-handed way that made me wonder what was really on his mind.

My eyes went straight to the cloth-covered tables laid out with breads and fruits and yogurt and silver chafing dishes. As soon as we sat, the view from the second-floor dining room totally co-opted my attention. We were looking out on a gorgeous waterfall and a pond that sparkled in the morning sun. Beyond that, the vibrant glow of leafy green trees.

“Can I start you both with coffee?” the grey-haired man asked.

Talia answered for us both. “Please—with cream and sugar.”

He nodded. “And orange juice?”

“Thank you,” Talia said.

When he’d gone, she took a deep inhale, smiled the widest smile I’d seen on her face in years, and breathed out a supremely relaxed exhale. Her skin gleaned like the pond outside.

Taking her hand, I said, “Do you even know how beautiful you look right now?”

She winked, because she wouldn’t blush. Wasn’t her style.

“Well? Should we get started at the buffet?” I asked.

“Wait until your coffee comes,” she said, tapping on the table.

I rolled my eyes. “Yes, ma’am.”

The loving look in her eyes made me feel absolutely giddy. Then she gazed over my shoulder and said, “Don’t look now, but I think we’ve got company.”

I turned, but I didn’t know what she was talking about.

“I said don’t look,” she chastised, without hiding the amusement in her voice.

“Don’t look at what?”

“Those two women behind you. I think they’re a couple.”

I turned again, and this time I got what she meant. They were older than us, I’d have guessed, but they could possibly have been friends. “Why do you think they’re a couple?”

Talia shrugged. “Just the way they steal the odd glance. They look like people who’ve been in love forever.”

“Aww,” I said as the server brought our coffee and juice.

“Feel free to try the buffet,” he said, inviting us both.

Talia thanked him and we went up together.

With our plates piled high, we returned to our table. As we took our seats, Talia smiled graciously over my shoulder. I turned to that pair of women and found them regarding us the same way we’d looked at them earlier.

“You’re right,” I said. “They must be lesbians.”

Talia raised that sexy brow as she poured a little cream in her coffee.

I’d barely started my breakfast when my coffee moved through me. Good thing I could rush to the restaurant bathroom instead of having to go in the one I shared with Talia. Even after seven years together, I couldn’t do a number two when she was around. I’d never even farted in front of her.

The bathroom was really fancy. Only two stalls, but the sinks were granite or something fancy like that. Brass taps. Looked like something you’d find in a rich person’s house.

When I returned to the table, I felt much better and packed in a nice meal, one glass of orange juice, and three cups of coffee.

By the time I’d finished eating, I had to go again—only pee this time, so I thought I might hold it until we got back to the room. Then, when Talia asked the server for another cup of coffee, I changed my mind. “I’m just going to pee really quickly, okay?”

Tilting her head, she gave me an odd look and said, “Take your time, honeybun.”

“Okay… but I only have to pee, so it shouldn’t take too long.”

“Okay,” she said, in a weirdly high tone. “Just do me a favour, will you? Once you get to the bathroom, wait five minutes before going. Will you do that for me?”

“Why?”

Her expression hardened into the Talia I knew from the bedroom. “Just do it, Cassie.”

I felt my eyes bulge. “Sure. Whatever you say.”

“What time do you have?”

I looked at my watch. “Nine forty-five.”

“Don’t go until nine fifty.”

“Okay.”

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0128EACV2?tag=dondes-20
It was a good thing I didn’t have to pee more urgently, because the closer I got to the bathroom, the more pressure built. It was like my bladder could sense a toilet in the vicinity. Once I was inside the restroom, it started screaming at me, begging for release.

What could I do? I’d promised Talia.

And it didn’t matter that she wouldn’t know the difference. Didn’t matter that she wasn’t watching over my shoulder. That wasn’t relevant.

I would obey her because… just because.

Standing by the sink, I looked myself in the mirror, endlessly fascinated by the dark depths of my own gaze. Could there possibly be someone else in my brain, someone else staring back at me from inside those eyes? I always felt watched when I looked at myself in the mirror.

But I could only stare at my own reflection for so long.

Too bad I’d left my purse in the room. If I’d had it with me, I could have entertained myself by sorting through gum wrappers and old receipts. That old bag needed a good clear-out.

I glanced at my watch. Time wasn’t going by fast enough.

Good thing nobody else had come in the bathroom. They’d think I was weird.

I walked to the open stalls and looked inside. Both clean, both smelling like cinnamon and pecan spice. That’s one of the great things about fancy bathrooms: they always smelled nice.

Three minutes down, two to go.

I stepped into the stall I’d used last time. As I did, the main door to the washroom opened. My heart jumped, which put pressure on my bladder. I reacted by closing the stall door so whoever it was wouldn’t wonder why I was standing there with it open.

“You’d better not be peeing,” Talia said.

A wave of relief washed over me and I opened the stall to her. “No, of course not. Two minutes to go.”

When I stepped out, I saw that she wasn’t alone. Following her were the lesbians from the table behind me.

I felt instantly embarrassed for what I’d just said, and hoped they hadn’t understood.

“We’re here to watch,” Talia told me.

The other couple looked at her, not at me. They were well-dressed, but nondescript. You wouldn’t necessarily peg them for lesbians. I wouldn’t have, at least. I guess because they weren’t butch.

Which is stupid, because I’m not butch. Not a bit.

But why was I thinking about what these women looked like when I should be freaking out about what Talia had just said?

“You’re here to…watch me?” I asked. “Watch me do what?”

“Pee,” Talia said. “It’s about time. Go ahead. We’ll be here, all eyes on you.”

Talia and the two strangers crowded around the stall.

Clearly, I wouldn’t be closing the door.

“I don’t think I can do this. Pee in front of strangers?”

“Sure you can,” said the woman with the turquoise scarf.

“If you have to go badly enough, your body will let go,” said the one in the salmon-coloured pantsuit.

Talia grinned. She’d won, and she knew it. She could humiliate me in every way possible, and I’d come crawling back for more.

Every time.

Because I loved it.

As I pulled up my skirt, sheer embarrassment burned through my skin. When I pushed down my panties, it started to fade.

Was this really happening?

Was I starting to feel proud?

I watched the strangers’ gazes focus on my bare pussy as my underwear settled just above my knees.

“Oh my,” said the one with the turquoise scarf. “Look at that, Margaret: she’s shaved completely clean.”

“Just the way I like her,” Talia told them.

For some reason, that statement made me feel more embarrassed than having my panties down and my skirt pulled up. She made it sound like I shaved my pussy to please her. That was only half true. I didn’t do it because she made me. I didn’t want these strangers thinking our dynamic was cruel in a controlling way.

Cool air rose off the toilet water and met my pussy like a dream. There wasn’t time to argue. That cold sensation against my hot lips made me desperate to release what I was holding so tightly.

“Oh look, Margaret! She’s about to go!”

When I rested my bum on the cool plastic seat, the humiliation factor came storming to the fore. Suddenly, I couldn’t do. I didn’t want these women watching me pee. It was embarrassing beyond belief.

“Talia,” I whispered, as if they couldn’t hear me. “Please let me close the door.”

I had my foot on it. She had her hand on it. She shook her head, no.

Clenching my pelvic muscles as hard as humanly possible, I looked at my girlfriend and blinked back tears.

How could she do this to me?

“What are you waiting for, Cassie? Aren’t you going to pee for these nice ladies?”

I bit my lip so hard it bled. I’d never been so mad at Talia.

How dare she do this to me? How dare she?

“Cassie,” Margaret said to the other women. “What a pretty name.”

“It’s short for Cassandra,” I said through gritted teeth.

“Even prettier,” Margaret said to her partner, like I wasn’t even a person, like I was some kind of exhibit at a museum.

That did it, for me. To prove I was human, I spread my legs, relaxed my aching pelvic muscles, and let the pee fly.

My entire belly felt warm as urine left my body. I’d been holding it in so tightly I felt like I was peeing through a straw again, which was annoying since it would only drag this scene out longer.

Talia’s gaze danced from me on the toilet to the two strangers standing beside her. They looked on indulgently, though nonetheless excitedly. As they whispered inane comments back and forth, I wondered if either of them had been in a situation like this before.

Were they old hands at watching girls pee?

Had they peed in front of each other?

Had they peed ON each other?

I covered my face with my skirt and groaned.

“What’s the matter, little girl? You don’t like ladies watching you?”

Without even looking at Talia, I could see the expression on her face: cruel, teasing.

“Why are you pushing me?” I cried, whipping my skirt down from my face. “You always do this. You always push me. And you think you’re always right, even when you’re dead wrong! Dead-dead-dead-wrong!”

The strangers’ eyes opened as wide as Talia’s and they whispered back and forth, “Trouble in paradise” and “Maybe we should go.”

Talia didn’t argue with them and neither did I. When they left us alone in the bathroom, I tore reams of tissue from the roll.

“That was embarrassing,” Talia said.

“Yeah, for me!”

With her gaze downcast, she said, “I thought you’d like it.”

She looked genuinely hurt.

I wasn’t used to that. Talia was always so powerful and commanding. She knew what she was doing and she stuck to her guns.

Maybe not this time?

“I’m sorry if I was wrong,” she said, with great emotion in her eyes and in her voice. “I thought bringing them in would be something new and fun, something we’ve never done before.”

This threw me for a loop. I really expected her to argue with me and say she was right to do it and I was wrong to complain.

“I apologize, Cassie.” Talia touched my cheek gently, then traced her thumb across my lip.

I caught it between my teeth and grinned as I bit her.

It’s weird, but I would have been mad at her if she was mad at me. Since she was so apologetic, I felt apologetic too.

“Maybe I’d have been more into it if I knew they were coming. You really sprang the voyeurs on me.”

“I didn’t even plan it,” Talia admitted. “I was going to come myself, just me, to watch you. Then as I was getting up from the table, they caught my eye and smiled and I thought… well, maybe I’ll just ask… maybe they’ll be into it.”

“And they were?” I asked with a laugh.

“Guess so,” Talia told me. “I didn’t even have to explain myself or out dynamic or anything. They really seemed to get it.”

I was still holding a wad of tissue between my thighs, too engrossed in this strange conversation to wipe. “Maybe they’re big-time BDSM people, like bigger than us.”

“We just dabble,” Talia said. “They seem… yeah, they’re committed.”

“How do you know?”

Talia shrugged. “Just a vibe.”

I finally cleaned the spritzes of pee from my thighs and flushed the toilet. As I pulled up my panties, I said, “I know we’ve talked about it, but I don’t think I’m ready to have other people…”

“In the room while you’re peeing?” Talia asked with a laugh.

I rolled my eyes and headed to the sink. “Not so much that. More like…”

Talia knew what I meant. I could tell by the expression on her face when I caught her watching me in the mirror. “You like the idea of an open relationship, or some variation, but you’re not ready to put the plan into action.”

“Yeah.”

I knew she knew.

She came up behind me and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. Her big boobs shoved me forward against the counter and I laughed because I wasn’t expecting it. She grabbed a paper towel when I turned off the taps and used it to dry my hands.

“I left a tip at the table,” Talia told me. “Want to sneak out the back way so we don’t have to pass that other couple?”

I was relieved she said it so I didn’t have to. “Oh my God, Tal, so much. You don’t even know.”

“Trust me—I know,” she said, and kissed my temple.

Where to buy Wet Weekend:

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0128EACV2?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B0128EACV2
Canada: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B0128EACV2
Australia: http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B0128EACV2

BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/wet-weekend-giselle-renarde/1122344238
Apple: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1021481990


Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/en-CA/ebook/wet-weekend-a-second-spritzing-of-lesbian-gold
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/562945
Excitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/wet-weekend-a-second-spritzing-of-lesbian-gold.html

Monday, October 24, 2016

Room for More: Two Guys, One Girl #Menage #Erotica


https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-roomformoretwoguysonegirl-2155738-168.html

When Amber Quill Press closed its doors this spring, I got so busy reissuing my novel Anonymous that I forgot all about the other work that came back to me: a fun threesome story called Painting with Brushes.

If you've been reading my books since as far back as 2010, when this one was originally published, maybe you remember it. It won a Readers' Choice Award (at Love Romances Cafe, I believe), which blew me away. I guess a lot of people liked it.

You'll be happy to know Painting with Brushes is back as Room for More. If you enjoy a little friction with your fiction, check it out!


Claudia detests Mark. Mark detests Claudia. They both love Jason Paul.

Two years after Claudia’s husband leaves her for another man, she finds herself unemployed but desperate to stay in the city. The only solution is to move in with Jason Paul and his new love. When sparks fly, will Claudia imagine the possibilities of having two men in her life… and in her bed?

Room for More is now available from:


Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MA60E91?tag=dondes-20
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/673392?ref=GiselleRenardeErotica

BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/room-for-more-giselle-renarde/1124914094
Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/en-us/ebook/room-for-more-two-guys-one-girl
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1166822069


Excitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/room-for-more-two-guys-one-girl.html

Enjoy!

Thursday, October 20, 2016

I'm Here. I'm Queer. Buy My Books.

Do you know how many books I've written over the past ten years? Yeah, me neither. But a lot. Definitely a lot--and when I say "books" I mean everything from erotic shorts to anthologies to novels to novellas.

I'm queer. I tend to write fiction from that perspective and on that topic, though I have written books about straight people too.

If you were to ask me, "Hey, Giselle, what do you write?" I would say, "I write queer fiction and erotica."

A lot of my books have been shoved into "romance" categories over the years, but I'm telling you straight-up: if you're into that whole romance scene with the happily-ever-after and no cheating I would just avoid my catalogue completely. I never set out to write romance. I set out to write queer fiction and literary erotica (and, more recently, pure SMUT!).

A lot of my books involve adultery because I spent 10 years of my life as mistress to a married man... which makes me kind of an expert, not to brag or anything. I know adultery intimately. That's why it sneaks its way into my work. Just like queerness. Just like gender non-conformity. It's part of me. It's part of my work.

The Other Side of Ruth is such a great example of what my work is and what it isn't. That book's about Ruth, a middle-aged married woman, who has an affair with Agnes, her twenty-something neighbour. Boom! Cheating. Right there. Boom! Lesbian erotica. Bring it. But this book's also a classic example of what I do because SPOILER it doesn't not end in typical romance fashion. That's because it's not a romance!

I come from the school of literary fiction where misery reigns. To me, The Other Side of Ruth is about all the ways in which Agnes is failed by society. She's failed by the people in her life, by systems, but the medical establishment. She's even failed by the book itself, because she doesn't get to tell her own story. We hear it from Ruth's point of view.

When I think of the most romantic book I've written, the one that pops into my head is Friday Night Lipstick--a friends-to-lovers novella about two older trans women. This book legit makes me cry every time I read the final chapter (which SPOILER does contain a typical happy ending), but it fails to meet the romance standard in other ways. First up, one of the characters is married throughout most of the book (albeit to an abusive partner), and the other has sex with two people right in front of her.

So this is me telling you where I'm coming from in hopes of finding more readers who are looking for the kind of fiction I write: readers who are looking for fiction from a non-binary queer, readers who appreciate literary erotica and/or smut, readers who aren't necessarily fans of the cookie-cutter approach to fiction (not that there's anything wrong with that!), readers who want something a little... different.

Because that's me. I'm a little different. And if you are too, or you just want to see what my world looks like, buy my books. Or see if your library carries them. If they don't, ask them to buy a copy of something that interests you. Or search my name at Smashwords or Kobo or Barnes and Noble or Apple and see what I'm offering for free this month. There's always something.

And sign up to receive my newsletter so I can tell you about new books as they come out: http://eepurl.com/R4b11

I'm here. I'm queer. Nice to meet you.

Monday, October 17, 2016

#FREE #LESBIAN #EROTICA Bobbing for Peaches

https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-bobbingforpeacheslesbianerotica-2150993-356.html
Have I got a treat for you!

My erotic lesbian short story Bobbing for Peaches involves warm milk, sweet peaches, messy sex and depression. What more could you want?

Well, you might want it FREE.

Done.

I've made this story available as a free ebook at most vendors. Possibly this is a limited time only deal. Possibly I'll forget to raise the price. Hard to say. I've got a terrible memory--I'll tell you that much.

Not sold? Here's what it's all about:

Someone's getting busy in the kitchen! When Jocelyn arrives home from work, she finds her girlfriend Melanie preparing a sweet treat: a warm concoction of milk and peaches with a dash of cinnamon and a hint of pricey Tahitian vanilla. Good thing Jocelyn's in the mood to play with her food, because it's time to get naked—and get messy!

Here are some of the links to ebook retailers where Bobbing for Peaches is free:

https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-bobbingforpeacheslesbianerotica-2150993-356.html
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/671804
Barnes and Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/bobbing-for-peaches-giselle-renarde/1124820553
Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/ebook/bobbing-for-peaches-lesbian-erotica
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1164481444


Excitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/bobbing-for-peaches-lesbian-erotica.html

Enjoy!

Saturday, October 8, 2016

#Taboo #Lesbian #Erotica In Print!

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/taboo-lesbian-erotica-giselle-renarde/1124712828

 I promised I'd let you know when my new anthology of taboo lesbian erotica was available as a paperback.

Well, guess what? The wait is over!

You can now buy Taboo Lesbian Erotica in print. You can buy the standard edition from retailers like http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/taboo-lesbian-erotica-giselle-renarde/1124712828

OR you can buy the large print edition for the SAME PRICE. If you need or would prefer larger lettering you don't have to choose between reading comfort and the impact on your pocketbook (pocketbook? Wallet. Credit Card. Whatever the kids are calling it these days. heh)

Here's a link for the large print edition: https://www.amazon.com/Taboo-Lesbian-Erotica-Large-Print/dp/1539337340?tag=dondes-20

Whether you just started reading my books or you've been buying them for a decade, I want you to know how much I appreciate your purchases. Thank you and enjoy!

Sunday, October 2, 2016

Preorder In Shadow Today!

https://books2read.com/links/ubl/3kZrvO

Last November I wrote a novel for NaNoWriMo (National Novel-Writing Month). I wanted to write something commercially-viable, something that would hit the market running and earn me enough money to buy fancy cheeses and maybe even a house.

Well, you've known me long enough to realize my plans to write anything with more than niche appeal tend to fall flat.

I set out to write a stepbrother romance because those were really popular at the time. What I ended up with was an allegory of colonialism.

Technically I guess it is still a stepbrother romance... but it takes a bit of a circuitous route to get to a happy-ever-after. It's really more of a psycho-sexual thriller. Even the eroticism isn't as as blatant as it is in most of my books. Or maybe it's MORE blatant because it's more understated, if that makes any sense. I don't think the words "pussy" or "cock" appear at all in this novel. I found a way to communicate powerful images without using vulgar language. Not that I'm opposed to vulgar language! I mean... this is ME we're talking about, author of Nanny State and Adam and Sheree's Family Vacation. But I do realize there are some books you're willing to read on the bus and some books you're only going to read in bed.

https://books2read.com/links/ubl/3kZrvO
You can read In Shadow anywhere.

And you can preorder it now from many vendors--ebook only at this point, but I'll let you know when the paperback is available.

In Shadow launches November 1st, 2016. Preorder now so it pops up on your device as soon as it's available.

If you follow the https://books2read.com/links/ubl/3kZrvO/ link, it'll show you all the sites where you can preorder.

Here's that list for your convenience:
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1141673003
Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/ebook/in-shadow-a-novel
Barnes and Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/in-shadow-giselle-renarde/1124327243

In invite you to subscribe to my mailing list too, so you can stay up to date with my literary comings and goings: http://eepurl.com/R4b11

Saturday, October 1, 2016

If You Love Romance, You’ll Hate This Book

Hard to believe my lesbian novel The Other Side of Ruth launched almost a year ago. This October, I'm bringing back guest posts I wrote for other bloggers when the book came out.

Here's one of my favourites:


I myself am depressed more easily by works that evade, compensate or cover up than I am by ones that pursue their patterns to the conclusions inherent in them. I’d rather have an unhappy ending than a happy one if it’s an unhappy ending that the story demands.
~Margaret Atwood, from Survival: A Thematic Guide To Canadian Literature


Brief introduction for those who don’t know me: I’m Giselle, I’m Canadian, I’m queer, and I write books for a living.

Well… “books” could be anything from short taboo smut to novels with erotic content—the latest of which is The Other Side of Ruth, subtitled “A Lesbian Novel.” Not “A Lesbian Romance,” note. Although the book involves a woman falling in love with another woman, I really wouldn’t class it as a romance.

A couple years ago, I was talking about my books with my mom (a rarity—we don’t generally discuss my work). She knew I wrote erotica, and extended that to encompass erotic romance. Yes, sure, some of my books have romantic aspects (and some are actually tear-jerkingly sweet), but I still think of myself as primarily a writer of literary erotica and queer fiction.

My mom couldn’t understand what I was saying. She asked, “How can there be sex with no romance?”

First of all… awww! Isn’t my mom just the cutest? (Yeah, she is. She’s adorable.)

But secondly… that’s a remarkably complex question.

For a book to be considered a romance, or erotic romance for that matter, it needs to meet certain criteria. Basically, it needs to be about people falling in love and it needs to have a happy, fulfilling ending for those characters.

Right? (I’m kind of making up rules, here.)

Anyway, there’s more to romance than just the falling in love part and the happy ending part. In order to appeal to readers in the romance genre, a book needs to have a certain ebb and flow. You’d have to ask a romance reader about the finer points of what they’re looking for.

Here’s the thing: a “happy ending,” in the context of romance, has a pretty narrow meaning. Two (or more?) characters need to fall in love and end up together. If a character’s happiness comes from anything else at all (finding oneself, coming out of the closet, achieving world peace, bringing your dog back from the dead) that’s not romance.

Right? (I’m honestly making all this up.)

So what can you do if misery appeals to you?

Well, if you’re me you say, “Screw it. This book is not a romance.”

That’s what I did with The Other Side of Ruth. Ruth is thirty years older than Agnes, and she’s married to a man. We’re talking about sneaking around. We’re talking about lying. We’re talking about an illicit love affair.

When I started writing The Other Side of Ruth, I hadn’t exactly planned out the ending (or the middle… or the beginning…), but I knew I wouldn’t be doing this story or these characters justice if I shoehorned in a happily-ever-after for them. It’s not that they don’t “deserve” it… it’s just that I’m a realist—in life, and in fiction.

Sorry-not-sorry for the spoiler.

I realize there are a lot of readers who won’t pick up a book unless they KNOW they’re going to like the ending. I almost-sort-of understand. Almost. Sort of.

For instance, the end of The Cure for Death by Lightning ruined to story for me. Does that mean I wish I hadn’t read the book at all? No. I recognize that, as a reader, the most I can do is interpret what’s on the page. It isn’t my place to demand a different ending.

On the other hand, the ending of The Well of Loneliness (which *SPOILER ALERT* is pretty much exactly the same as the end of The Cure for Death by Lightning) is heartrending but perfect. It’s perfect because it’s realistic. You read it and think, “Yup, that’s life. Sucky, unfair, terrible life!”

Since many readers of romantic fiction are seeking to escape life (sucky life!) it makes sense that heartbreak wouldn’t make for a fulfilling capper, but me? I happen to like seeing life reflected back to me in fiction.

Anyway, what were we talking about? Oh yeah, The Other Side of Ruth. Yup, it’s got real life written all over it. Now I’ve got you thinking it’s all angsty-painy when, really, it isn’t.

To be honest, I find the ending optimistic and uplifting, even if it isn’t conventionally romantic.

That’s my take. I guess you’ll have to read it and decide for yourself.

The Other Side of Ruth is available as an audiobook and also in print.

Get the paperback at http://www.amazon.com/Other-Side-Ruth-Lesbian-Novel/dp/151776159X?tag=dondes-20


Listen to the audiobook 
US: https://www.audible.com/pd/B076ZV1FXY/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-099700&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_099700_rh_us
UK: https://www.audible.co.uk/pd/B076ZV14ML/?source_code=AUKFrDlWS02231890H6-BK-ACX0-099700&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_099700_rh_uk


Buy the ebook at 

Also available from many other retailers!

Friday, September 30, 2016

Taboo Lesbian Erotica: 10 Scandalous Stories

Have I got a hot read for you!

It’s forbidden. It’s wrong. You know you should resist, but the desire is too strong…

In Taboo Lesbian Erotica, kittens and cougars can’t fight their illicit urges. Their lust for someone off-limits is impossible to shake. What can they do but surrender to temptation? Especially when temptation comes in the form of discipline, punishment and scandalous sex with a woman who’s absolutely forbidden!

Ten shocking stories of women who can’t say no to scandalous sex!


Get it NOW from Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LYZX36T?tag=dondes-20
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/668964?ref=GiselleRenardeErotica
BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/taboo-lesbian-erotica-giselle-renarde/1124712828
Excitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/taboo-lesbian-erotica-10-scandalous-stories.html

TABOO LESBIAN EROTICA contains new fiction and fan favourites. There are definitely stories in this book you've never read--stories about stepmothers punishing stepdaughters, stepsisters getting off together, a niece who's hot for her aunt, even a godmother assigned to give her goddaughter "the lesbian sex talk."

If you love taboo erotica, this is the book for you! And this week it's on sale as a new release for the low price of $2.99. That's TEN erotic stories for the price of ONE!

Get it NOW from Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/668964?ref=GiselleRenardeErotica
BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/taboo-lesbian-erotica-giselle-renarde/1124712828
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LYZX36T?tag=dondes-20
Excitica: http://www.excitica.com/index.php/taboo-lesbian-erotica-10-scandalous-stories.html

Friday, September 23, 2016

7 Fun Things to do on your Back


If you clicked because you thought I'd be telling you cool sex stuff, HAHA gotcha! Nah, I'm not trying to fool anybody. The truth is that my girlfriend and my cousin are about to undergo cornea transplants. For days afterwards they're going to have to lie flat, otherwise their eyes will fall out or something. I'm not 100% clear on the details.

(To be absolutely clear, my girlfriend and my cousin are two different people. I'm not dating my cousin. It's not like a wrote a lesbian erotica story called Pretty Cousin because I've got some kind of weird forbidden crush on her or anything.)

Anyhoo, the idea of people I love going under the knife is making me nervous so I'm channeling that energy into practical ideas. How bored would you get if you had to lie on your back for days just staring at the ceiling? Maybe you're doing exactly that right now and that's why you're exploring this post--you're searching for stuff you can do without using your eyes.

Well, here it is: my list of fun stuff to do on your back. I'll leave out the obvious (hopefully you can figure that out for yourself) but I will mention that I'm focusing on free options, relying on you having access to a library system, and focusing on Canadian content because I live in Canada, and so do my girlfriend and cousin.

1. Audiobooks.


My girlfriend's been reading audiobooks for years, even before her eyesight started deteriorating, so this point was the first that came to mind. She gets them from the library on CDs, but check out your library's website. You probably have access to audiobooks you can digitally download.

Alternatively, you can try out a 30-day free trial at Audible or purchase audiobooks or get them... I don't know where, exactly. I'm not a connoisseur. Every time I try to listen to an audiobook I just totally tune out. But, as I say, my girlfriend LOVES them so that's why Audiobooks are #1 on this list. UPDATE: Turns out I do know where to get audiobooks. Click here to read my post on the topic!

2. Podcasts


I wish I had a hundred million podcasts to recommend to you, but there are only a few I listen to with any frequency and they're all writing and publishing related. I'm sure there are a hundred million out there, so run a search. Find an established one that suits your interests and BINGE BINGE BINGE!

On the off-chance you, too, are an author, entrepreneur or author-entrepreneur (authorpreneur? Is that a thing people say?), I'll give you the inside scoop. Here are the podcasts I listen to:

The Creative Penn (highly recommended!)
Rocking Self-Publishing
The Worried Writer
It's a Mystery Podcast

Unemployable

3. Accessible Media/Described Video


This one is an especially Canadian recommendation. AMI-tv is a television channel available through every digital cable package in Canada (trust me--I have the most basic cable package in existence and I get). Every show on AMI is broadcast with described video.

What's described video? Okay, so try watching a movie or a TV show with your eyes closed. When there's a bunch of dialogue you can probably follow what's going on. What about when no one's talking?  How do you know what's going on? That's where described video comes in: a voiceover tells you what's happening, so you don't have to be able to SEE the television to follow the show.

AMI also creates a lot of original programming that's particularly relevant to its blind and low vision viewership. My favourite is Four Senses, a cooking show co-hosted by Christine Ha. In addition to the English TV channel, there's also AMI-télé which broadcasts in French with described video and also produces its own original content.

There's a third channel, AMI-audio, which is audio-only:

Daily, a team of professional narrators present feature articles from top Canadian and international magazines and hourly information updates. AMI-audio also produces a variety of original programs covering historical and current events, technology, entertainment and more. On February 1, 2016 AMI-audio launched Live from Studio 5, its first ever live studio morning show. AMI-audio original content is also available through satellite radio and as podcasts.

I watch the AMI French and English TV channels a lot, and one thing I really love about them is you start to feel a sense of community. Maybe it's just me. Maybe I need more friends.

p.s. I should mention that if a TV show is available with described video on another Canadian network (and if DV is available that should be announced before the show starts), you can enable your TV to talk at you the same way you can turn Closed Captioning on and off. To be totally honest with you, I've tried to do this on multiple occasions and it's never worked, so thank goodness for AMI.

p.p.s. If you don't have a TV and/or you do most of your media consumption via Netflix, I noticed the other day that when I scrolled all the way to the bottom of my Netflix screen there was a thingy that said "Audio Description." Sure enough, it took me to a browse screen of shows and movies available with audio description enabled!

4. Radio


Hey, you know what still exists? Radio! Some of it plays songs at you and some of it is talking... just like podcasts. In fact, you can listen to a lot of radio shows online now! I'm going all-in on the Canadiana today, because I'm sending you down CBC way.  I particularly like a show about the advertising industry called Under the Influence.

Again, the alternative to looking for this stuff on the internet would be to turn on a radio. If you own one.

5. Comedy Albums


Remember comedy albums? Me neither because I wasn't alive in the 70s!

Here's how I came to realize comedy albums are still a thing: my public library system gives me access to this great digital service called Hoopla. I stream music there (mainly Lana Del Rey--one of these days I'm really going to have to purchase Born to Die) but one time I started browsing, just to see what else was available. I came upon this category: Comedy Albums.

Comedy Albums? Is that still a thing?  I thought of Cheech and Chong, Steve Martin, George Carlin--and yes, their classic albums are still available--but alongside those are albums from contemporary comedians: Aziz Ansari, Amy Schumer, Jim Gaffigan... I'd have to list every comedian you've ever heard of and then a bunch you've never heard of. There are so many!

Let's get ready to laugh!

6. Radio Dramas


Having been born after the time of comedy albums (or so I thought), I was also born after the day of radio dramas.

Or so I thought.

Then one day I took a tour of the CBC building here in Toronto and they showed us their radio drama recording studio. It was the coolest set-up, because part of it looked like the kind of TV set you'd see on a sitcom. There was a kitchen set up so the voice actors could physically act out emptying the dishwasher and closing cupboards. There were stairs to walk up and down. There were pads containing things like gravel or twigs to mimic the sound of walking outside.  The way I'd always pictured a radio drama setup was... remember that episode of Frasier where they do that murder mystery radio drama? But the one at the CBC was surprisingly large.

So yes, Virginia, radio dramas still exist! I found a bunch of them listed on Hoopla (again, through my library system), including Doctor Who radio dramas. With a quick Google search I've found you a bunch of them produced by the BBC and CBS Radio Mystery Theater.

7. Language Learning Albums


We're going old-school one more time with the idea of language learning disks. I use a program called Mango but you need to look at a screen for that. If you're flat on your back and you can't do screen-related stuff, go back in time--back to the 80s and those language learning cassette tapes. Perfect time to bring them out again. The most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me was to learn French, although it wasn't my girlfriend who made that gesture. Wasn't my cousin either. heh.

I'll mention Hoopla yet again, because that's where I saw language learning albums listed as digital downloads. See what your library systems has got for you. If you've never explored digital download services provided to you free through your public library, now's the time!

If you need to spend time on your back, might as well enjoy it!


http://patreon.com/audioerotica