Wednesday, September 30, 2015

The Lesbians Have It!

What do they have? Top spot in August print sales--that's what!

Bestselling Giselle Renarde paperback books this August were:


Wet Weekend

When Girlfriends Talia and Cassie set off on a romantic resort getaway, who knew they'd discover a wet and wild new fetish on vacation?

Cassie's a good sub who'd do anything for her girl, but what happens when Talia springs a scary surprise on her? If Talia requires total control over her bodily functions, will Cassie be ready to submit?

As a special BONUS, this paperback edition of Wet Weekend also includes Lesbian Gold--an unforgettable collection of lesbian fetish erotica!


Have Yourself A Sexy Lesbian Christmas

Is your holiday lacking lesbian cheer?
Have you been craving seasonal sensuality since your neighbours erected a ten-foot inflatable Santa?
Then this is the short story mini-anthology for you!
What's inside?
Three fan favourites plus a brand new meet-cute holiday hotmance Giselle wrote exclusively for this collection.
Unwrap the woman of your dreams right here in Have Yourself a Sexy Lesbian Christmas!


What Do Lesbians Do In Bed?

Have you ever wondered what lesbians do when they get together? Is it all fingers and scissors and lips between legs, or is there WAY more to the slippery story of lesbian sex?

In this hot new anthology, enjoy twenty-one explicit tales of lesbian love. From shoe fetish to opera gloves, sex in public to quiet winter mornings, even connoisseurs of fine girl-on-girl action are likely to discover a new idea or two in this sexy new collection.

Whether you can appreciate this book's title ironically or you're authentically curious about what girls who love girls do in bed (or in parked cars or at the office or in a church basement or in a restaurant bathroom), grab a copy today and get in on the nitty-gritty secrets of lesbian sex.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Friday, September 25, 2015

New Charity Anthology! LGBT Love: 10 Queer, Trans, Bi, Lesbian and Gay Romance Stories

Cover art features jeans and hightops
LGBT Love
10 Queer, Trans, Bi, Lesbian and Gay Romance Stories
by Giselle Renarde

***All royalties from the sale of this anthology will be donated to charitable organizations supporting LGBT individuals and communities.***

LGBT Love is in the air! Fall for romance with 10 sensual stories by award-winning queer author Giselle Renarde. From lesbian cops to gay professors, bisexual businessmen to transgender soldiers, diverse characters find the everlasting affection they’ve been searching for in LGBT Love.

You can buy this anthology as an ebook, but you can also buy it in print and the royalties will still be donated to charity. Same goes for the large print edition.

Since today is My Sexy Saturday, I'll share with you the first 7 paragraphs from the first story in the collection--one of my favourites, about a young trans woman and trans man who fall in love: Everybody Knows.

You know when you’ve just given some guy a blowjob and then you have to take the subway right after and you feel like everybody knows?

So, that’s where I’m at right now. Just sitting here on this faux-fancy velvet red seat, smelling like cum, and feeling so conspicuous I could hang myself. Sure I swallowed, but that’s never good enough. The scent doesn’t go away. It sticks to your hair, doesn’t it? And your skin. Sex is in my aura, gossiping with other passengers, telling strangers secrets that aren’t really true.

I’m not a total slut. And I’m not a whore. Shut up, aura! You wanna take this outside?

There’s a guy all in black standing by the doors. I know he’s looking at me while I pretend to read that subway ad about Why Can’t Street Kids Just Get A Life? I get the feeling he knows it’s for show. I’m glancing his way, really subtle, catching only outlines of his bulky body.

I imagine myself whipping my head around and shouting, “What are you staring at, motherfucker?” but I second-guess myself. Maybe he’s not looking at me. Maybe I’m wrong. Hey, it happens. But I think I’m right this time. I’m pretty sure I’m right.

So I turn my head to meet his gaze, but he’s not looking at me. He’s not. He’s just staring into oblivion, and suddenly I’m the one staring at him… because I’m not sure anymore if he is a him. I look at his chest, look for telltale boobs, but I’m still not sure. He’s got a vest on. It’s hard to say. Smooth cheeks, though. Too smooth. Butch dyke? Maybe. Or trans guy. I don’t know.

And suddenly he’s looking at me, right at me, and he asks, “What are you staring at?” He doesn’t say “motherfucker.”

I'm offering LGBT Love at an introductory price, so if you want to snag a deal AND feel great about where your money's going (ie. to help queer people who need a little support), now is the time to buy!

Barnes|Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/lgbt-love-giselle-renarde/1122642963
Apple: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1038917868
All Romance Ebooks: https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-lgbtlove10queertransbilesbianandgayromancestories-1894075-166.html
Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/en-CA/ebook/lgbt-love-10-queer-trans-bi-lesbian-and-gay-romance-stories
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/576050

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0155ZIXXU?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/LGBT-Love-Lesbian-Romance-Stories-ebook/dp/B0155ZIXXU

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Out Now! – Eyes Wide Open by Lucy Felthouse #erotica #romance #bdsm #menage #mmf

The following is a post by Lucy Felthouse
 
Eyes Wide Open Cover
A standalone novel from the Totally Five Star imprint.
An ordinary girl catapulted into an extraordinary world meets two even more extraordinary men—but what will she do when she discovers their sexy secret?
Fiona Gillespie moved to London shortly after graduating to take advantage of the opportunities the capital could offer. However, months later, she’s still living in a horrid flat and working in a grimy East End pub. The problem is, she doesn’t really know what she wants to do, career-wise. So when she happens upon an advertisement for a job at a plush Mayfair hotel, she jumps at the chance. A great deal of determination and a spot of luck land Fiona her dream role.
But working at the Totally Five Star London is just the beginning. She adores the role and flourishes, impressing her bosses and making her increasingly determined to climb the career ladder.
While her career is flying, though, her love life is non-existent. She hasn’t even thought about men, never mind met or dated one for months, so when she bumps into two gorgeous businessmen in the hotel, she’s surprised to find her head has been well and truly turned. Even more surprisingly, they flirt with her—both of them! She’s drawn to James and Logan, despite feeling that they’re way out of her league.
When a misunderstanding leads Fiona to James and Logan’s sumptuous top-floor suite, she has no idea what she’s about to uncover. Scenes of people-trafficking, drug-pushing and wild sex parties all appear in her active imagination. Yet what she actually sees is something she’d never even considered before, something that piques her interest.
After discovering their sexy secret, what will she do with this new-found knowledge?
Reader Advisory: This book contains scenes of anal play, spanking, sex toys and bondage.

Excerpt:
Continuing to surreptitiously peer at the men over the rim of her glass, it hit her that this was the first time in months that she’d looked at a man with interest, much less two men—and at the same time! But, ready to snatch her gaze away if one of them happened to glance at her, she realized that it wasn’t surprising that the pair had attracted her attention.
The tailored business suits would draw the eye even on an ugly guy. But on these two, the fine clothing was practically an orgasm for the gaze. They sat opposite each other, and their angle to her meant that she had a view of both their profiles—lucky her.
The one to her right had very dark, almost black hair, with a bit of a curl to it, a long straight nose, a trimmed goatee and, if she wasn’t mistaken, deep blue eyes. It was hard to tell for sure from this distance and perspective.
The one on her left had lighter, shorter hair, stubble that by some magical feat still looked smart, and the most sinful lips she’d ever set eyes on. And speaking of eyes, she thought perhaps his were green. What she wouldn’t give to go and check both of them out close up, preferably naked.
Shocked at her own sudden lustful thoughts, she inhaled more than drank another sip of the juice. Unfortunately, it hit her throat all wrong and she almost slammed the glass down as she started to cough. She tried so hard to suppress the cough, eager not to draw attention to herself, that she made it worse. Snatching up the thick linen serviette from the table, she held it to her mouth as she spluttered in a most embarrassing manner, and tears began to roll down her cheeks. By now, she was sure that the whole damn restaurant was staring at her, and she wished the tablecloths reached the floor, like the ones in the restaurant upstairs, so she could hide under the table until she regained her composure.
Swallowing repeatedly to try to soothe her irritated throat, she gasped as a gentle hand laid on her shoulder, which set her off all over again.
“Oh God,” came a voice. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you jump. I just wanted to make sure you were all right. See if I could help.”
Unable to speak, Fiona waved a hand to try to signal that she’d be okay, but unless the guy was a mind reader, he’d have no luck figuring that out. Blinking through the tears that marred her vision, her urge to hide underneath the table grew stronger. Christ, it was only the hottie with the blue eyes. And, if she wasn’t mistaken, his sexy friend with the green eyes was also hovering close by, concern etched into his handsome features.
Managing to drag in a breath, she huffed out, “Thank you.”
Just then, Jeremy arrived with a carafe of water, complete with ice, and poured her a glassful. “Here you go, Fiona. Drink this. Are you all right? Anything else I can get you?”

Author Bio:
Lucy Felthouse is a very busy woman! She writes erotica and erotic romance in a variety of subgenres and pairings, and has over 100 publications to her name, with many more in the pipeline. These include several editions of Best Bondage Erotica, Best Women's Erotica 2013 and Best Erotic Romance 2014. Another string to her bow is editing, and she has edited and co-edited a number of anthologies, and also edits for a small publishing house. She owns Erotica For All, is book editor for Cliterati, and is one eighth of The Brit Babes. Find out more at http://www.lucyfelthouse.co.uk. Join her on Facebook and Twitter, and subscribe to her newsletter at: http://eepurl.com/gMQb9

Monday, September 21, 2015

Oyster Is Done Like Dinner!

Oyster Books is closing up shop. Now who's going to tell me my books won't be listed on their shelves because: "The content is primarily of an erotic nature, intended to stir sexual desire."

If you've never heard of Oyster, it is/was an ebook subscription service where you pay a monthly fee for access to as many books as you can read. I shouldn't imply that NONE of my books were listed there. Some are/were... like Sweet Lesbian Love Stories, which has no sexual content.

In a blog post that uses a lot of words to say pretty much nothing, Oyster Books announced they "will be taking steps to sunset the existing Oyster service over the next several months. If you are an Oyster reader you will receive an email personally regarding your account in the next few weeks."

This Publishers Weekly post is more informative: http://www.publishersweekly.com/pw/by-topic/digital/content-and-e-books/article/68130-oyster-is-shutting-down-operations.html

What's left as far as ebook subscription services? Well, there's Amazon's Kindle Unlimited, which is shitty for authors because they demand exclusivity (so we can't sell our books anywhere else) and Scribd, which recently unloaded a bajillion romance books because romance readers read too much.

I've kind of lost track of how many of these "such and such a site is closing down" announcements I've made over the years.

To be honest... I get a little scared...

Saturday, September 19, 2015

#MySexySaturday Callie and the College Boys

Callie’s cottage has been taken over… by college boys!

All Callie needs is a weekend away from real life. Just two calm days at her haven of relaxation. Is that really too much to ask? Apparently so, because when she gets to her summer home it’s full of young people: friends of her son’s and students at the nearby university.

Is she angry? Not after falling into bed with two young men and a bottle of Kahlua! But can the love of two college boys solve all life’s problems? Or will family issues throw shade on Callie's sunny getaway?

Callie and the College Boys
by Giselle Renarde

Older Woman, Younger Men
MFM Ménage Erotic Romance

ONLY $0.99 THIS WEEK!!!


Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B015HQSSVE?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B015HQSSVE
Amazon Canada: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B015HQSSVE
Amazon Australia: http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B015HQSSVE

BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/callie-and-the-college-boys-giselle-renarde/1122662926
Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/ebook/callie-and-the-college-boys


Since it's My Sexy Saturday, I'm going to share the first 7 paragraphs of Callie and the College Boys:

Friday night traffic out of the city was killer. The weekend weather report predicted gorgeous temperatures, sunny and unseasonably warm for mid-April. Naturally, every family from Belleville to Burlington decided this was the perfect time to escape into the luxurious wilds of cottage country.

Callie turned up the volume on the radio, but static was taking over already. That was a good sign, she reasoned—if she was out of signal tower range, she was getting closer to the lakeside summer house. Still, she wished this damn car had come with a CD player. It had some sort of iPod connection, but she didn’t own an iPod, despite her son’s insistence she buy one, so that was pretty useless.

Even out here in Frontenac county, traffic was as thick. The evening air choked her with highway exhaust fumes. If only the moral high road was an actual street I could drive on, Callie kept thinking. She was taking the moral high road, wasn’t she? By leaving the house and avoiding the temptation of destroying every precious objet d’art therein?

Yeah, this was the moral high road, all right. She couldn’t be tempted to Hulk Smash the summerhouse. She simply loved it too much. It was a haven for relaxation, always had been. After a nice, quiet weekend by the lake, she was sure to return to the city having gained a great deal of perspective on the current turd pile that was her life.

When she pulled onto the heavily treed lane under cover of darkness, she’d already switched off the car stereo. Over the satisfying crunch of gravel beneath her tires, she heard voices. Her first instinct was “burglars!” until she realized the voices weren’t whispering, but chatting, laughing. The neighbours must be up and throwing a party.

Callie drove up the slim grass path into their lot. When she spotted the cottage, she realized her instinct was only partially correct. The summerhouse was lit up like an Amsterdam storefront, that red-scarf-over-the-lamp effect, and there were other cars in the drive—a mix of ancient station wagons and gleaming little high efficiency vehicles. The drivers and passengers of those vehicles were, she assumed, the people scattered across the deck and milling about her getaway home.

A growl burbled up in her throat like acid reflux, burning as it reached the back of her tongue. “Dante!” she spat as she switched off the ignition.
***
Remember, Callie and the College Boys is ONLY $0.99 THIS WEEK, so now is the time to pick up your copy!

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B015HQSSVE?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B015HQSSVE
Amazon Canada: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B015HQSSVE
Amazon Australia: http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B015HQSSVE

BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/callie-and-the-college-boys-giselle-renarde/1122662926
Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/ebook/callie-and-the-college-boys

Friday, September 18, 2015

Preorder LGBT Love: 10 Queer, Trans, Bi, Lesbian and Gay Romance Stories

LGBT Love cover art
***All royalties from the sale of this anthology will be donated to charitable organizations supporting LGBT individuals and communities.***

LGBT Love is in the air! Fall for romance with 10 sensual stories by award-winning queer author Giselle Renarde. From lesbian cops to gay professors, bisexual businessmen to transgender soldiers, diverse characters find the everlasting affection they’ve been searching for in LGBT Love.

The book comes out September 24th. Just a quick note about the preorder price: it's $2.99, which is an introductory sale price to get the ball rolling. The paperback is already on the market... which was an oops on my part, but oh well.

Paperback back cover
If you want LGBT Love in print, you can get it for $15.
Same goes for the Large Print Edition.

And here are some ebook preorder links:
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0155ZIXXU?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/LGBT-Love-Lesbian-Romance-Stories-ebook/dp/B0155ZIXXU

BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/lgbt-love-giselle-renarde/1122642963
Apple: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id1038917868
Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/en-CA/ebook/lgbt-love-10-queer-trans-bi-lesbian-and-gay-romance-stories

Thank you for helping me raise money for organizations that provide support to my fellow LGBTQ people. Every purchase is so much appreciated. Thanks again.

Hugs,
Giselle

Saturday, September 12, 2015

#MySexySaturday STEPBROTHER AND COMPANY #99cents

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B014X7C3KU?tag=dondes-20
Adam poses for the camera!
If you thought nothing could be more taboo than STEPBROTHER SUMMER, you won’t believe what happens in StepbroCo...

After two months of forbidden love at the cottage, Sheree crashes at the townhouse Adam shares with a motley crew of college students. There are no spare rooms, but she doesn’t mind sleeping on the couch. It’ll only be until she finds a job. No big deal, right?

But Sheree isn’t interested in mainstream work. She lounges around all day, tempting her stepbrother and annoying Adam’s rent-paying housemates.

When Adam and his roomies find out about the sordid online business Sheree’s built right under their noses, will they kick her to the curb… or choose to be used?

A steamy stepbrother romance novel including multiple partners and mind-blowing ménage!

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B014X7C3KU?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B014X7C3KU
Amazon Canada: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B014X7C3KU
Amazon Australia: http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B014X7C3KU

***
EXCERPT

Adam breathed hard as Sheree’s fist slid up and down his dick. “There’s no reason you couldn’t stay with Mom and Dad. You just don’t want to. You’re not my problem.”

“Aren’t I?” Sheree arched on the bed without releasing Adam’s hard-on. Her free hand yanked the crotch of her jean shorts to one side, giving him an explicit view of her peachy shaved pussy. “If I’m not your problem, whose problem am I?”

Adam’s heart raced as he stared unapologetically at his stepsister’s cunt. The muscles in her forearm struggled to keep her cut-offs pulled out of the way. Rough denim pressed against her most tender part. His cock pulsed because, god, he knew that pussy. He knew it well.

“Quit fighting me, Adam.” Sheree inched her wet pussy closer to his dick. “Just shut your face and let me fuck you.”

His cockhead spilled precum across her clit as she rubbed him there. Fuck, that flesh was hot stuff. Pulpy, swollen, juicy, and pink. Who was he kidding? He wanted inside. He wanted to ram his dick into his stepsister’s tight snatch and fuck her brains out. Just the thought of it…

“No, don’t!” She ran her fist up his shaft and squeezed the tip. “Don’t you dare come yet!”

Adam’s body gyrated on the bed. He flopped like a fish trapped in Sheree’s net. “I can’t… I can’t stop it!”
***

Stepbrother and Company is only $0.99 this weekend, so buy NOW!!!

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B014X7C3KU?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B014X7C3KU
Amazon Canada: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B014X7C3KU
Amazon Australia: http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B014X7C3KU

If you're visiting from Canada, why not enter to win a $25 CAD iTunes card?

a Rafflecopter giveaway


Friday, September 11, 2015

Friday Freebies: Hot Lesbian Erotica for Nuthin'!

Two young women in black lingerie.
Kathryn's Kinky
Lesbian Threesome Erotica
by Giselle Renarde

Remember my lesbian ass-licking threesome story Elementary, My Dear Kathryn? It needed updating (well, the title and the cover did), so now you can get it as Kathryn's Kinky, a story of domination, submission, school reunions, menage sex, and the licking of ass--FREE this weekend from...

Amazon| http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0155P6UQW
Amazon UK| http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B0155P6UQW
Amazon Canada| http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B0155P6UQW
Amazon Australia| http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B0155P6UQW



An ominous woman stares ominously.
Punishing Sadie
Taboo Lesbian Erotica
by Giselle Renarde

This one is new and taboo. (heh that rhymes)  Bad girl gets spanked (and more) by her stepmother, who suspects her of sleeping with her boss/father's friend. Forbidden lesbian lust! Silky robe tie rope bondage! Knee-high boots! Concussion!

Get it while it's free!

Available from Amazon| http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0156PTM2K
Amazon UK| http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B0156PTM2K
Amazon Canada| http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B0156PTM2K
Amazon Australia| http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B0156PTM2K


Canadians, enter to win a $25 CAD iTunes gift card!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Tweet this link to share the contest: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/cfaac6021

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Felicity's First: Threesome Erotica

Two women lick a lollipop
Felicity’s never been with a man. The same can’t be said for her girlfriend. Robyn’s bisexual, and she’s always saying how great it feels to get with a guy. Felicity isn’t overly attracted to dudes, but Robyn’s got this one ex who’s pretty cute. Maybe they could go at him together?

Brant is happy to sacrifice himself to Robyn and Felicity’s first-time sex experiment, but are the girls really ready for a threesome?

FELICITY'S FIRST
A bisexual erotic comedy from award-winning queer author Giselle Renarde.

Now Available

BN| http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/felicitys-first-giselle-renarde/1122614912
Smashwords| https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/574273/?ref=GiselleRenardeErotica

Google Play| https://play.google.com/store/books/details?id=R_d5CgAAQBAJ
All Romance| https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-felicity039sfirstthreesomeerotica-1881910-146.html


EXCERPT

She’d spent a lot of her life being afraid of cocks, but she wasn’t afraid of Brant’s. There was something different about it—probably the fact that it was attached to a gay guy, or maybe just the fact that it was attached to someone as dreamy as Robyn’s ex.

“Just put it in your mouth,” Robyn said. “It’s not that hard.”

Brant clicked his teeth. “Thaaanks.”

Robyn let out a low chuckle. “That’s not what I meant and you know it. It’s not that difficult. Here, I’ll show you how it’s done.”

“What are you doing?” Brant and Felicity asked, in unison. They obviously shared a sense of shock and awe as Robyn got down on her knees and took her ex’s cock in hand.

“I like to play with it first,” Robyn said as she took the base of Brant’s shaft in her fist. “Oh, wow, you need to feel how it’s pulsing.”

Robyn handed his cock to Felicity, who took hold of it the same way she would have if her girlfriend had passed her a carrot. It wasn’t until she had it in her hand that the idea sunk in that she was holding a penis. It really hit her when the thing wiggled and wagged like a dog’s tail.

Squealing, she dropped it, but it didn’t fall. It stayed there, attached to his body, and pointing straight at her.

Brant and Robyn both laughed, and Robyn said, “What a wimp!”

“I didn’t expect it to move,” Felicity said, trying to sound like a mature adult and knowing full well that she didn’t. Wrapping her hand around the stiff cock, she stared it down like this was a battle she had a chance of winning. “Okay, there. I’m holding it. What now?”

“This,” Robyn said, and licked the tip like a lollipop.

Also Available from Amazon| http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B014U8MYJW?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK| http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B014U8MYJW
Amazon Canada| http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B014U8MYJW
Amazon Australia| http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B014U8MYJW



a Rafflecopter giveaway

Tweet this link to share the contest: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/cfaac6021/?

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

What kind of writer are you?

I've decided I'm Alf.
ALF, the alien, eating a kitten
No, not that Alf. This one:
Alf Ventress, from Heartbeat, cuddling a kitten
I found myself watching an old episode of Heartbeat at two in the morning, and my brain started making all these strange connections.

See, I know a lot of really successful authors. I'm super-duper not ONE OF THEM. They make BIG MONEY off their books. I... do not. I know people who earn more in a month than I earn in a year. Waaay more.

But I'm happy. Yes, that's right: I have the audacity to be happy while poor. I've learned that's something you're not supposed to say around rich people, because we poverty-stricken individuals are supposed to be striving for better, better, more, more, more!

I always say if I wanted to be rich, I wouldn't be a writer. But you can't say that around writers who have gotten rich by writing because they're just like... well, I did it. What's your major malfunction?

That's just it: I don't have one. I am content with my tiny market share. I have a roof over my head. I live in a safe neighbourhood. I can afford to buy food! Life is good.

But what does any of this have to do with my pal Alf Ventress?

Alf and I are twinsies because we show up every day. We're always around. We do the job, eat a few boiled eggs, put the kettle on.

We're slow, sure, but what's the rush?

We're not driven toward other people's ideas of success, but that doesn't make him any less of a village bobby and doesn't make me any less of a small-time writer.

You don't tune in to see Alf, but he's always there and there's something comforting about that. All these young coppers from London, they have their flash in the pan and then they take off. Think of the number of young actors (and older ones) who came and went of the course of Heartbeat's history.

Alf was always there.

I'm Alf. I'm always around. I'm always publishing something. My output is consistent. I don't give up when the going gets tough because, for me, the going has always been tough. Success never embraced me. Or, if it tried, I shied away because I don't enjoy the spotlight. Of course I want people to buy my books (that's what pays the bills, after all), but is it worth screaming how great I am all over the internet all the time?

No way. That would be exhausting. Anyway, I'm nothing special. I'm just here. I've been here going on ten years, and that's not about to change any time soon.

So buy my books at your leisure. I know a lot of authors who packed it in when they weren't shiny and new anymore, but I'm not one of them. I was never shiny and new--or, when I was, nobody knew I existed.

Life will go on and I'll keep writing. Every day I'll be at my computer, writing. That's just the kind of writer I am.

What kind of writer are you?

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Monday, September 7, 2015

For Canadian Eyes Only! Yes, that's right: A Contest for YOU!!!

If you're Canadian, you know how disappointing it is to see a contest and be like "YEAH MAN! I'm totally gonna win that!" ...and then you see that it's open to US residents only.

Well, it just so happens that I have this $25 iTunes gift card code to give away, and it also just so happens that it's a Canadian Dollar gift card valid for the Canadian iTunes store and can be redeemed only by persons in Canada. Them's not my rules. That's what it says on the back of the gift card. I would more than love to open this contest to everybody in the whole wide world, but the prize wouldn't be of much use to anyone outside Canada.

This contest is extremely easy to enter. All you have to do is simple stuff, like sign up for my newsletter, follow me on Twitter, all that. I'm using Rafflecopter, so you can see all your options below. There are a couple (like retweeting my tweets, I think) that you can enter daily.

So have fun! Love you!

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Thursday, September 3, 2015

Teach Me! Banned by Apple and Kobo (so I'm giving you a free copy)

A year ago, I published TEACH ME, a collection of erotic stories featuring teachers and students (over the age of 18, I should say). As a former student who had an affair with a former teacher, I consider myself an expert on the subject. But this smut bundle isn't just about me. It includes works by Jade K. Scott, Lexi Wood and Cami Ayers too.

The reason I'm writing about it now is that I just got an email from Apple telling me they've taken it off the market. If you're an author who's ever had a book banned by Apple, you know the kind of FUCK YOU reaction it elicits. Not just because they've banned your book, but because they go out of their way to pretty much call you a child molester. Makes me feel like a criminal every time.

And this happens a lot. Apple bans almost all of Lexi's work. They don't allow pseudoincest erotica (stories about step-family members fucking) on their site.

But this is kinda weird. TEACH ME has been on the market for almost a year (it was published September 10, 2014). It sold well at iTunes. So... it took a year for them to decide it was too dirty?

Fine. Whatever. Well, not really "Fine. Whatever." but what am I going to do? Argue with Apple?

Here's what I did: I plugged in the link for TEACH ME at Kobo, and want to know what I got?

Sorry, this item is no longer available. You can look for other items by this author or about this topic using the search bar above

Gee thanks, Kobo--for banning my book and not even having the courtesy to let me know. I looked up a few more books and found they'd done the same thing. Just quietly removed books from sale without informing me.

Yeah, this is a book of smut. I won't argue with you there. But I'm getting sick of ebook retailers banning shit left and right.

So what am I going to do about it?

I'm giving you a free copy of TEACH ME. The book is still available at Amazon and Barnes|Noble, and if you'd like to pay money for it be my guest! But this weekend, you can redeem the Smashwords coupon below for a free copy. And I hope you will!

Go here: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/475293
Use Coupon Code: YV77A
Expires: September 8, 2015
And you'll get TEACH ME for $0.00!

If you want to pay your hard-earned cash for the book, have at it:

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NI1KBRA?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00NI1KBRA
Amazon Canada: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B00NI1KBRA

BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/teach-me-six-scandalous-sex-stories-giselle-renarde/1120337373

Love you!
Giselle