Thursday, May 1, 2008

Date Night with a Sweet Transvestite

I’ve always identified as an “I date people” person. What does that mean? It means I won’t date a man just because he’s a man and I won’t date a woman just because she’s a woman. I date people I find interesting and attractive in some way or another.

That said, if you had asked me even a year ago if I foresaw myself ever dating a transvestite, my answer would have been a resounding no. Transgender? Sure! But a cross-dresser? A man who wears women’s clothes just for the hell of it? I would have said that seemed a little odd.

Six months ago I met a man with the most beautiful sparkling eyes I’ve ever seen. He’s a fascinating person. He’s witty and clever and well read and he’s a cross-dresser. There’s a sense of equilibrium around him, a balanced duality. He is two people and he is one. There’s a softness to his character that I haven’t seen in many men or woman. There’s a certain comprehension of the world and of humanity that I’ve seen almost exclusively in trans people.

Three weeks ago, the butterflies began. I don’t know what happened, but I started seeing him differently. Suddenly I found myself very drawn to him, wanting to spend as much time together as humanly possible. He came to me one day and said, “Something’s changed between us. Something’s different.” And something was different: I was falling for him, and he for me.

I don’t think he’s weird. He’s just who he is, and I love who he is. I’ll take him dressed as a woman or dressed as a man; it’s all the same to me. We had our first date this afternoon. We went for a walk in this cold and rainy weather, holding hands all the way. Every new piece of information I discover about him is a gem. When we’re together, I’m happy. I can’t stop smiling.

I don’t date people because they have certain sex organs or because they wear certain clothes or identify as a certain gender. I find myself drawn to people with a strong sense of self, courageous people with an appreciation of life’s beauty. Sparkling eyes help too.